Strange Brouhaha

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Star Trek characters

We've been having an interesting email discussion, apparently inspired by something on some TiVo forum, about the five worst Star Trek characters. You get to pick one from each series. Here are mine.

  • TOS: This was tough. I can't think of a TOS character I actively disliked. Rand was annoying in "Miri," and Kevin Reilly was annoying in "The Naked Time," so I picked them.

  • TNG: Similarly tough, because the list is so long. Q heads the list of course, but there are so many that I hated that it would probably be easier to pick one I liked, of which more anon. Still, I pick Q without a doubt, followed closely by Data and Troi and Picard and Riker. And the Borg.

  • DS9: Quark or Dr. Bashir, with special mention to Odo under the heading of "crappy reimplementation of Star Trek archetype." (Dis)honorable mention to Q.

  • VOY: Seven of Nine. I think Jeri Ryan was a good actor--not for *those* reasons!--but Seven pretty much ruined the show in more than one way. Data with no charm (and Data already had no charm), Spock without the logic, Odo without the shapeshifting: file her under crappy reimplementation of archetypes as well. (Dis)honorable mention to Q.

  • ENT: There were characters on that show? I'd pick Q, but they didn't put him on the show. Reed or Mayweather, I suppose. Enterprise was a ball of nothing.

We've also been trying to name the five best Star Trek characters.

  • TOS: Captain Kirk.

  • TNG: I liked the little mind-control worms who were all set to invade the Federation before the writers dropped one of the few good ideas they ever had. I also liked the black oozy thing that killed Tasha Yar. There's not really much I liked about TNG, so picking a "best" character from that show is, for me, sort of like trying to pick the warmest rock in a snowbank.

  • DS9: Chief O'Brien.

  • VOY: Captain Janeway. Yeah, I said it. She was a good Kirk implementation, I thought.

  • ENT: Doctor Phlox. I'm unsure, though, whether I liked the character or the actor. Regardless, the show was only really good when he was onscreen.

Really...I only liked Star Trek. So trying to pick the best and worst of the other series was actually pretty tough.

While I'm on the subject: PLEASE, Paramount, stop making Trek until the 50th anniversary. Then come out with something good, made by people who don't hate Star Trek. Thank you.


  • (MattK) I won't give you a hard time for liking Janeway, if you won't give me a hard time for liking Q.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:51 PM  

  • You both suck.

    By Anonymous FrankieCrisp, at 3:12 PM  

  • So Frankie, does that mean you like Janeway *and* Q? Or what?

    By Blogger Savannah, at 6:33 PM  

  • Nothing to do with Star Trek really. I just think these two guys suck.

    By Anonymous FrankieCrisp, at 9:45 AM  

  • (MattK) Have you seen us suck, or do you just assume we do?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:56 PM  

  • When I was in law school, my band played two nights at this biker bar in Riverside, Iowa. It has laid claim as the "future birthplace of James T. Kirk." The walls are lined with empty Jager bottles, and over the bar there's a wood carving of a couple engaged in a sexual act. The second night we were there, I took a drink from what I thought was my coke, but was actually somebody's spit cup. Ah, good times.

    By Anonymous Josh, at 12:19 AM  

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